Gifted/Talented/Twice-Exceptional Teens

Some argue that the hallmark of giftedness is not intelligence per se, but intensity (see Piechowski et al., 2004). As the parent of a gifted teen (and perhaps a gifted teen once yourself), you may recognize the truth of this. While giftedness comes in many forms—intellectual pursuits, academic excellence, productive thinking, leadership, the arts—common to all of these is the intense emotionalism of navigating an expansive internal world. “Overexcitable” (Tieso, 2007) or “Highly Sensitive” (Benham, 2006) are just two ways such teens and adults are often described.

Unfortunately, such emotional intensity can generate considerable pain for the gifted teen and/or their family. Worrying about things other children do not understand or are not concerned by (e.g. civil wars in foreign countries, global warming and the fate of the planet, or even existential anxiety), high levels of perfectionism, underachievement associated with feeling they are not living up to their “gifted” label, social withdrawal, and conflicts with teachers, siblings, and parents as they test boundaries are all common (Fornia & Frame, 2001). Ultimately, these difficulties can lead gifted individuals to experience low self-esteem and alienation from peers, teachers, parents, and even themselves.

If a teen is “twice exceptional”—meaning that in addition to their giftedness they a have co-occuring disability such as dyslexia, ADHD, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, slow processing speed, or another learning disorder—they may also feel as though they are torn between two worlds. Although they are told they are gifted, their specific difficulties can feel exceptionally frustrating as they expect themselves to be strong in all areas (King, 2005).

Fortunately, giftedness often supplies these teens and their families amazing resourcefulness in generating novel and oftentimes ingenious solutions to interpersonal and intrapersonal conflicts. This is part of the reason we so deeply love providing assessment and therapy to gifted and twice exceptional individuals. Treatment oftentimes goes far beyond a “return to baseline” and toward unanticipated new heights (Kazimierz Dabrowski once referred to this as “positive disintegration” in learning to embrace our own individuality). What is most needed by these teens and their families is not assistance in conforming to academic/social standards, “scripts,” or averages, but support and amplification of the teen’s unique way of understanding the world to reframe and overcome current difficulties toward lifelong success (Fornia & Frame, 2001).

If you believe you or your loved one may benefit from social and emotional support surrounding giftedness, please don’t hesitate to reach out to a professional. It would personally be an honor to accompany you or your loved one on the journey toward meaning and joy.